This is Luis. He is an ICU physician in Brazil.
“I am used to discussing the likelihood of death. However, the COVID-19 pandemic made me think about my own mortality.
As soon as the pandemic started to spread in my country and home town Guadalajara, I speculated ‘what type of clinical presentation might I develop if I catch the virus?’ Hearing that colleagues have died around the world makes you consider the worst case scenario.
Within the last 2 years I had an episode of pneumonia, a serious influenza infection complicated with a mild acute kidney injury, and was diagnosed with asthma.
If I were to catch COVID, there is a very real possibility I would develop a severe infection with complications.
However, after thinking and imagining the worst case scenario, I was surrounded by intense feelings. A moment of clarity arrived – each day with my full health is invaluable.
After embracing my own mortality, something wonderful happened. I started to appreciate the little details – food tasted better, the bad and good moments were analyzed in a more conscious way. Each day has become a conscious decision to be better, to enjoy the silence that the lockdown has created, and to use my free time to do something meaningful for my mind or body.
I hope to maintain this mental state as long as possible, which seems difficult due to the amount of uncertainty. I want to continue to be my own master and to be as conscious as I can of my thoughts and actions.”
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